


Harder to Breathe

by traumingelb



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Cancer, M/M, Sadstuck
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-09-27
Updated: 2012-09-27
Packaged: 2017-11-15 04:27:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,245
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/523134
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/traumingelb/pseuds/traumingelb
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>John receives some very shocking news, and he doesn't exactly know how he's going to tell people. Old two-shot fic.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey! So basically, this is a short two-shot I wrote back in June. If you spot any errors, feel free to point them out to me! :)

Your name is John Egbert, and you have no idea how the fuck you're going to explain this to anybody. 

You'd been experiencing a bit of trouble breathing for a while now, but paid no mind to it. You've had a relatively harmless case of asthma since you were young; the only proof of that was the one incident when you were around three years old in which you had an attack. Other than that, you've been fine, though you can't really overexert yourself when you're working, as you'll run out of breath quicker than others. And you were definitely doing some hard work this past weekend: you and your boyfriend, Dave Strider, have been helping your friend and his sister, Rose, move in to a new apartment.

Therefore, you were definitely not expecting it when you collapse the next Monday at work, suddenly unable to breathe.

When you're shipped off from your work in an ambulance, you take every little piece of breath that you have to make sure that your boyfriend isn't notified of this; you tell them to ''say that I have a meeting with someone that's going to run really late, and that I won't be home for a while“. You don't want Dave to get worried about this. You know for a fact that he's got a deadline to meet today, and he can't have anything distracting him from it. So, despite constantly being asked by the hospital staff for a relative or loved one's phone number, you just as constantly decline, saying that ''Nobody that I know of is home right now“.

The doctors give you some sort of drug, trying to get you to start breathing normally again, and ask you to consent to a few medical tests. You give them whatever consent they need, sign the form they give you, and allow yourself to drift off as they perform whatever tests they need.

Fast forward through all of those tests that you were half-asleep for, and suddenly you're wide awake again, your breathing returned to normal and your mind as clear as it ever will be. A nurse pops in a while after you wake up, and she leaves just as fast as she came before returning a few minutes later with a doctor, his white lab coat almost the same colour as his short, neatly-styled hair.

''Good evening, Mr. Egbert.“ He says, and you can almost hear the sympathy in his voice. All you can think is ' _Oh God, what happened?'_ and _'It's not that bad, is it?'._ The doctor clears his throat for a brief moment before speaking up. You don't pay attention to most of what he's saying; a lot of it is medical gobbledegook vocabulary that you never learned and you will probably never know the true meaning of. All you manage to hear is the end of his spiel, and oh God, you did _not_ want to hear that at all.

''To put it simply, Mr. Egbert, you have lung cancer.“

Oh God.

Oh, _God._

' _This doctor must be crazy,'_ You think, ' _Is he high or something? I couldn't have lung cancer. That's impossible.'_

And then suddenly, he's telling you that it's spreading fast and springing you with options for your treatment, whether you'd like to start chemotherapy as soon as possible or if you have some things that you need to take care of first. You tell him that you'll be fine, and to start the treatment as soon as possible. He nods, and you two set up an appointment. Check in to the hospital on Wednesday night so that you can be properly ready for your appointment on Friday, he says. It's mostly to relieve any sort of anxiety and make sure that any required medical procedures are done, he says.

You?

Honestly, you don't care anymore. All you're wondering is how you're going to tell Dave...and then, suddenly, you have a plan.

Your name is John Egbert, and you have no idea how the fuck you're going to explain this to anybody.

So, you're not going to.


	2. Chapter 2

Okay, so you lied. The next day, you tell your work that you're going to have to take all of your sick days, and then you tell your father what's going on, mostly because you're still on his health insurance plan, and in case you actually do need some help with things. His response to the news is a grim expression for the rest of the day, and a tight hug as you're about to leave.

When you get home on Tuesday night, Dave is lounging on the couch, (surprisingly) watching one of your old movies. He says that it's “one of those days“, and he pulls you onto the couch next to him as he kisses you everywhere that you can think, telling you how much he loves you. You constantly remind him that you return those feelings, and by the time that you both make it to bed that night, you've used the phrase “I love you“ so many times that it's almost lost its flavour. You tell him one more time before you go to sleep, though, telling him that you'll always love him, no matter what happens. He kisses your forehead, and you both drift off to sleep in peace that night.

 

–

 

Your name is Dave Strider, and you're not exactly sure what the fuck is going on right now.

You'd seen that John hadn't been in the best mood when he came home on Monday, which was a major bummer considering that you were actually estatic that day from finishing your script before your deadline. When he woke up on Tuesday, he was in the same mood. So you tried to help him feel better that night, making sure that he feels all the love that you have for him, mostly by giving him as many kisses as possibly possible and sitting through his lame old movies.

So what the fuck is going on right now?

He made a nice breakfast in the morning, letting you eat your fill before telling you that “Dave, we need to talk“. You were fine with that, too, thinking that it was just him telling you that he actually burnt the eggs and that they weren't supposed to be that crisp, or that he was going on another business trip. You didn't expect for him to say “Dave, I'm breaking up with you and moving out.“

 

–

 

Your name is John Egbert, and this may be the hardest thing you've ever done in your life.

From what you've thought, though, this was the only way to tell him without worrying him. You stayed up after Dave had fallen asleep last night, rehearsing it a few times in your mind and even a few times out loud, which are the times that Dave obviously didn't hear. His reaction is fine, too: he doesn't object to it, just nods and replies with a simple “okay“. You assure him that you love him, but you can't be involved with him for a while, and that you'll come to see him as soon as you can. He only nods, though, and it's like he's back when you met him in middle school, nodding and pretending that he isn't freaking out internally.

You pack up your things, grabbing a few changes of clothes and some personal objects that you'd normally keep with you, and you leave.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aaaaaAAAAAAH I'M JUST READING OVER THIS AND IT'S RLY BAD u______u my apologies to everybody who read this?????? but thank you for reading!!!


End file.
